Last week in my BSF lesson, we talked about Matthew 15, this story has been rattling around in my head all week.
21 Leaving that place, Jesus withdrew to the region of Tyre and Sidon. 22 A Canaanite woman from that vicinity came to him, crying out, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on me! My daughter is demon-possessed and suffering terribly.”
23 Jesus did not answer a word. So his disciples came to him and urged him, “Send her away, for she keeps crying out after us.”
24 He answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel.”
25 The woman came and knelt before him. “Lord, help me!” she said.
26 He replied, “It is not right to take the children’s bread and toss it to the dogs.”
27 “Yes it is, Lord,” she said. “Even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their master’s table.”
28 Then Jesus said to her, “Woman, you have great faith! Your request is granted.” And her daughter was healed at that moment.
Some people are bothered by Jesus' reaction to this woman; that the God of compassion would turn her away. He does it not once, but three times! I am initially a little bothered by it, but then I remember how many times Jesus did things like this to test the resolve of those who approached, to see if what they asked for is what they really want or to teach his disciples something.
But in my case, it's this woman whom I keep thinking about. This Canaanite woman from Greece (that's in the Mark version) begging Jesus for help. Lest we forget, the Canaanites were the people the Israelites conquered in order to take possession of the Promised Land. So, I am guessing a group of Jews weren't exactly welcome guests in Tyre and Sidon. Despite that, she's heard about this Jesus and the things that he's done. This Gentile who likely worshiped the Baals or perhaps Greek gods, cries out, "Lord, Son of David have mercy on me.." That's a big step of faith and of cultural courage. She gets nothing but silence from Jesus and she makes the disciples uncomfortable. They ask Jesus to send her away. Jesus makes it clear that he's not there to help her, or so it appears. This woman approaches him, kneels before him, and says, "Lord, help me." Jesus quips that he should not share what is rightfully the "children's" with "the dogs." This woman, so clever, so desperate, so full of faith that Jesus can save her daughter, counters with "even dogs eat crumbs from the master's table." This. This is what Jesus has been waiting for, for her persistent faith, for her unwavering faith in the face of what seems to be complete rejection by the one she thinks can solve her problems who can give her what she really needs and really wants.
As I look at my own life, this is what I seem to lack. I'm getting better at some things, but being unyielding and hanging on by faith is not how I'm wired. Maybe it's all the stuff I've been through that has done that. I've learned to be better at saying "Okay, God, I don't like it, but okay," rather than continuing to ask, continuing to plead, continuing to have faith that God has something not just okay, but amazing for me. I have gotten pretty good at being okay with okay. Where is the line between "being content in all circumstances" and having that persistent faith? As I continue this job search, (and in other areas of my life) that is my dilemma. (Well, that and I don't really know what I want to be when I grow up.)
This coming Monday, I have only my second face-to-face interview in my a little over a month of unemployment. The job is in Frederick, Maryland. It's a job I applied to because, for unemployment purposes you have to show you're looking. It was one of the few jobs that I found last week that didn't require some kind of clearance. (Ah, the joys of DC.) My initial reaction to this opportunity was "ick," and "really, really, THIS is the door you're opening for me." As a young friend of mine said on my Facebook page...you must be mistaken I said FREDERICKsburg not FREDERICK. Now, I may get there and find it's amazing and Frederick would be a great place to move to. (I would have to move, I'm not built for a 2 hour plus each way daily commute). But, maybe God is using it to do a couple other things. 1. Make me really focus and decide what I want to do and where I want to do it. 2. Give me a chance to cling, to be persistent, to not waver..to not be okay with just okay.
Maybe it's time I live like this Canaanite woman.
No comments:
Post a Comment